Forever and a Day by Akanksha Pampangowdgari (USA, 17)

            It’s not that I fear change
I think I might be lying to myself.
Always so determined
to find eternity in a single moment

I’m scared of losing what I care for
you’re a hoarder, you cling on too much, you come on too strong
You’re Desperate.
they say and I just

add what they say to my pile

I was given a bouquet once
by someone I don’t talk to anymore
Of flowers in the brightest colors I’ve ever seen
and the kind of sticky pollen smell that always seemed to linger

but as it always does,
Time remains the villain in my story
​
I frantically tried to learn
how to preserve the blossoms I was burdened with;

A Manual on Necromancy
1. Put the flowers in a book (I scramble to find one, settling on a storybook from when I was young)
                          ((I never had the heart to throw it out))
2. Place under extreme pressure (Aren’t I already under enough?)
3. Wait for time to pass (more time? I don’t know how much I have left)
4. Seal and Dry. (the flowers stick to my hand, my fingerprints all over the crime scene)

I did just as I was told
and yet

Even with their newfound luster,
The flowers were made of faded dust

Even with what few shards of beauty they held onto,
They reeked of glue

Still, I am stubborn
I can’t lose this too

I can’t

Anyone else would have found it pointless
To try and do the impossible
​
I add what they say to my pile
I keep pressing flowers





Akanksha Pampangowdgari (she/her) is a senior at Obra D. Tompkins High School. An avid poet and researcher, she has dabbled in writing genres all across the board and can be found on Instagram at @floodedrollercoaster. After a years-long writing slump, she discovered her passion for poetry. Akanksha often enjoys taking on art projects above her skill level and taking long, contemplative walks thinking about just about anything.